Wednesday, August 5, 2009
Re constructing my thoughts
Well, Have not posted for 3 days now.
Not cuz I was busy with work, but mainly I have been trying to construct and piece up my train of thoughts.
No matter how many times I try, I still just can't just let W suffer the way he is now, yet, I can't really do anything.
I didn't really reflect on what I was thinking some time back, or so I just noticed. I guess.
How my reflecting more or less begun was stupid, seriously at I find it lah.
Well, talking a bit side track and all, my list of shows to watch for drama series wise was actually the following.
Rescue Force
Zettai Kareshi
Ketai 7
Rescue Fire
Well appaently it got messed up and I'm disappointed.
You see, while watching the last few episodes of Rescue Force, they changed the ending to I dunno what song, but the lyrics really caught me. Which was how I begun reflecting. In english, it goes something like this.
"Too much time has passed for us,
Before we realize it, we've become adults.
We suddenly become aware of our quivering hearts.
It makes my heart break a little."
It really did cause me to reflect on myself, how useless I was the past 3 months. Seriously.
I did almost nothing but emo.
Wasted so much sleep time.
Did so many useless things.
Stoned and blanked out too much.
Brooding over things that can't be change.
Seriously stupid, yet I dunno really why I did some things sometimes.
Yes, I know that its hopeless confessing to W, in fact it might make things worse, but it ain't getting better, for me now. Yet I choose to like brood over it and just emo over it. Stupid right?
I really want to help him, but I feel so helpless.
Yup, things like more responsibilities, I don't really noe if I like it, or do I depise it. I'm making myself having more responsibilities, but logically, its impossible to handle, but I think I can make it through. Just like what happened in sec 4.
Just that now, sometimes I feel I alone a not good enuff still. I may have done so much, but it takes two hands to clap, I never accomplished anything alone.
I sometime feel knowing too much is a bit too much for me as well. I should not have researched on things that I should not be bother with now.Or maybe I should have, but its a bit painful. I don't think I feel safe to even blog it.
I really wish to move forward, I know I'm running short on time. Seriously, yet I can't bear to leave the past behind. Its painful. Very.
*[[ Bounded By Chains... ]]*
|11:56 PM|
Wednesday, August 5, 2009
Re constructing my thoughts
Well, Have not posted for 3 days now.
Not cuz I was busy with work, but mainly I have been trying to construct and piece up my train of thoughts.
No matter how many times I try, I still just can't just let W suffer the way he is now, yet, I can't really do anything.
I didn't really reflect on what I was thinking some time back, or so I just noticed. I guess.
How my reflecting more or less begun was stupid, seriously at I find it lah.
Well, talking a bit side track and all, my list of shows to watch for drama series wise was actually the following.
Rescue Force
Zettai Kareshi
Ketai 7
Rescue Fire
Well appaently it got messed up and I'm disappointed.
You see, while watching the last few episodes of Rescue Force, they changed the ending to I dunno what song, but the lyrics really caught me. Which was how I begun reflecting. In english, it goes something like this.
"Too much time has passed for us,
Before we realize it, we've become adults.
We suddenly become aware of our quivering hearts.
It makes my heart break a little."
It really did cause me to reflect on myself, how useless I was the past 3 months. Seriously.
I did almost nothing but emo.
Wasted so much sleep time.
Did so many useless things.
Stoned and blanked out too much.
Brooding over things that can't be change.
Seriously stupid, yet I dunno really why I did some things sometimes.
Yes, I know that its hopeless confessing to W, in fact it might make things worse, but it ain't getting better, for me now. Yet I choose to like brood over it and just emo over it. Stupid right?
I really want to help him, but I feel so helpless.
Yup, things like more responsibilities, I don't really noe if I like it, or do I depise it. I'm making myself having more responsibilities, but logically, its impossible to handle, but I think I can make it through. Just like what happened in sec 4.
Just that now, sometimes I feel I alone a not good enuff still. I may have done so much, but it takes two hands to clap, I never accomplished anything alone.
I sometime feel knowing too much is a bit too much for me as well. I should not have researched on things that I should not be bother with now.Or maybe I should have, but its a bit painful. I don't think I feel safe to even blog it.
I really wish to move forward, I know I'm running short on time. Seriously, yet I can't bear to leave the past behind. Its painful. Very.
*[[ Bounded By Chains... ]]*
|11:56 PM|
kameyo
