Sunday, June 28, 2009
I dun like expelling aura...
Well, personally, I hate giving off aura.
Yesterday, as in on Friday, something happened and some people there were like saying, I was giving off a horrible aura. I hate it, I seriously hate doing that. Which was why I was a bit cautious about it today. Well, they managed to rid of it, and I really have to say thanks to those people. Litchie, Ah Gong and Pinku. I really appricieted what happened. Though I don't feel like talking about it on this blog.
Well, today, yesh, I have to agree it was a tiring day, and also quite a stressful day also.
I was like in my Zetton costume like for dunno how many hours. Had enough food water etc, but there were a few things that, I dunno spoiled my day, or what, but yah, quite a few things raided my mind.
Firstly, AH Gong left cuz he was pissed cuz he saw someone he almost wanted to kill. Not S, dun worry.
Next, Aki suddenly 12 plus tell me they need me to be on stage cuz they needed to interview me, for god knows what, while I'm in my suit. End up, she play me out. The only reason why I ended up on stage as a Cameo was thanks to a very nice friend of mine. Thanks. And I feel like killing you Aki for a moment there for your poor planning. But its ok, I guess. Forgive and Forgive.
Next, I have to admit, I seriously seriously love Aki's first lolita dress she wore and Kitty's second one. ( quite easy to tell who I am refering to ) Aki's one was like purple and I really liked the designs on the lower half. Ahhh~~~~ I wann... no $$$$
And Kitty's one, the second one, red and silver, was also very very nice. Seriously I really like the design alot. The cutting was simply beautiful. Yesh, I dunno how to describe, but I really really like that one. $$$
And the other thing that really really got to me, only today, maybe I'd say really hit me hard today was that I am Fat and Flat. Double F. Nids to loose weight. Seriously. I know I lost quite a bit, but I need to loose much much more. And that I am fucking flat. It really gets to me seriously.
THe other thing is, sometimes I really feel I very insecure, as in with my surroundings.
Esp with guys around.
Well, walked into a shop, and was like seriously loved quite a few of the dresses there. I was seriously very restricted. At least I felt. And here we have Pinku, who just pinks up dresses and all. Sometimes I dunno whether he's serious or just trying to be a joker.
Cuz, I seriously like some of he dresses, but I just can't bring myself to pick it up or really talk openly about it with guys or the shopkeepers around. Even if its Pinku, I still don't feel 100% comfortable with him around.
Another thing was that stupid cockroach. I Just can't stand them. Seriously, its made worse with my mom forever asking me to get rid of them when sighted at home. Yes, although I get the job done, I always gets scolded for screaming and yelling while getting rid of it, or extremely short tempered. Though my cat sometimes finishes it off, I still can't really clear even a dead one without any fear or whatsoever. Which was why I got so pissed at Pinku for a moment there.
And another thing that really really made me quite agitated, or I dunno how to put it, is their NS talk. Yes, personally, I don't really mind adventuring, trying out new things and all, but a few things made me really really hate NS, which I don't ever say in front of guys.
First, I have to wear fucking ungly clothes almost everyday, seriously horrid looking in my perspective.
Second, I can't fucking stand Cockroaches.
Third, I seriously dunno how it'll be stucked with only guys for another dunno how long, had enough in school. 10 freaking years.
Of course there are nice guys, but even so, most of the nice guys are still perverts and idiots. Its like, not that they are not kind and all, but seriously, I just can't stand them.
Next, I can't wear my skirts for dunno how long...
And another reason is, I seriously don't like training up, esp the hands. Which may sometimes explain why I don't like carrying bags which can only be held by handles.
I don't mind running, and all, but I seriously don't like thick hard muscles for my hands, esp when the veins start popping out. Best eg, Litchie.
I seriously don't like that, which is why, sometimes when I have the stregth to do somethings, I act weak, so that I don't strain my hand too much.
Also another reason why I uses more dancing to loose weight rather than most other exercise or working out at gyms.
Sometimes I would also like to have someone to rely on. I know sometimes I may act all crazy and all, but sometimes, I have my limits, I sometimes hide my weaknesses, and it can be painful. To cut short, I would seriously like a supportive type of boyfriend sometimes. Jealous...
*[[ Bounded By Chains... ]]*
|1:29 AM|
Sunday, June 28, 2009
I dun like expelling aura...
Well, personally, I hate giving off aura.
Yesterday, as in on Friday, something happened and some people there were like saying, I was giving off a horrible aura. I hate it, I seriously hate doing that. Which was why I was a bit cautious about it today. Well, they managed to rid of it, and I really have to say thanks to those people. Litchie, Ah Gong and Pinku. I really appricieted what happened. Though I don't feel like talking about it on this blog.
Well, today, yesh, I have to agree it was a tiring day, and also quite a stressful day also.
I was like in my Zetton costume like for dunno how many hours. Had enough food water etc, but there were a few things that, I dunno spoiled my day, or what, but yah, quite a few things raided my mind.
Firstly, AH Gong left cuz he was pissed cuz he saw someone he almost wanted to kill. Not S, dun worry.
Next, Aki suddenly 12 plus tell me they need me to be on stage cuz they needed to interview me, for god knows what, while I'm in my suit. End up, she play me out. The only reason why I ended up on stage as a Cameo was thanks to a very nice friend of mine. Thanks. And I feel like killing you Aki for a moment there for your poor planning. But its ok, I guess. Forgive and Forgive.
Next, I have to admit, I seriously seriously love Aki's first lolita dress she wore and Kitty's second one. ( quite easy to tell who I am refering to ) Aki's one was like purple and I really liked the designs on the lower half. Ahhh~~~~ I wann... no $$$$
And Kitty's one, the second one, red and silver, was also very very nice. Seriously I really like the design alot. The cutting was simply beautiful. Yesh, I dunno how to describe, but I really really like that one. $$$
And the other thing that really really got to me, only today, maybe I'd say really hit me hard today was that I am Fat and Flat. Double F. Nids to loose weight. Seriously. I know I lost quite a bit, but I need to loose much much more. And that I am fucking flat. It really gets to me seriously.
THe other thing is, sometimes I really feel I very insecure, as in with my surroundings.
Esp with guys around.
Well, walked into a shop, and was like seriously loved quite a few of the dresses there. I was seriously very restricted. At least I felt. And here we have Pinku, who just pinks up dresses and all. Sometimes I dunno whether he's serious or just trying to be a joker.
Cuz, I seriously like some of he dresses, but I just can't bring myself to pick it up or really talk openly about it with guys or the shopkeepers around. Even if its Pinku, I still don't feel 100% comfortable with him around.
Another thing was that stupid cockroach. I Just can't stand them. Seriously, its made worse with my mom forever asking me to get rid of them when sighted at home. Yes, although I get the job done, I always gets scolded for screaming and yelling while getting rid of it, or extremely short tempered. Though my cat sometimes finishes it off, I still can't really clear even a dead one without any fear or whatsoever. Which was why I got so pissed at Pinku for a moment there.
And another thing that really really made me quite agitated, or I dunno how to put it, is their NS talk. Yes, personally, I don't really mind adventuring, trying out new things and all, but a few things made me really really hate NS, which I don't ever say in front of guys.
First, I have to wear fucking ungly clothes almost everyday, seriously horrid looking in my perspective.
Second, I can't fucking stand Cockroaches.
Third, I seriously dunno how it'll be stucked with only guys for another dunno how long, had enough in school. 10 freaking years.
Of course there are nice guys, but even so, most of the nice guys are still perverts and idiots. Its like, not that they are not kind and all, but seriously, I just can't stand them.
Next, I can't wear my skirts for dunno how long...
And another reason is, I seriously don't like training up, esp the hands. Which may sometimes explain why I don't like carrying bags which can only be held by handles.
I don't mind running, and all, but I seriously don't like thick hard muscles for my hands, esp when the veins start popping out. Best eg, Litchie.
I seriously don't like that, which is why, sometimes when I have the stregth to do somethings, I act weak, so that I don't strain my hand too much.
Also another reason why I uses more dancing to loose weight rather than most other exercise or working out at gyms.
Sometimes I would also like to have someone to rely on. I know sometimes I may act all crazy and all, but sometimes, I have my limits, I sometimes hide my weaknesses, and it can be painful. To cut short, I would seriously like a supportive type of boyfriend sometimes. Jealous...
*[[ Bounded By Chains... ]]*
|1:29 AM|
kameyo
